The Past is all in the Past ... Most of the Time

Tonight, I made the stupid mistake of watching Technokayla, and its sequel. I think that watching those is one of the very few things in this world that can make me miss my former life. Not the life I used to have of drinking and being promiscuous ... but BEFORE that. Back when I was a teenager, and had what I thought was the best group of friends in the world.

We were an eclectic group of people. We didn't drink or do anything "bad" like most teenagers our age, but we still managed to always have the best time ever. We would watch somewhat "out there" movies, and we'd make them too. We would sing out loud to one another, and play our instruments in my old best friend's backyard. We spent every Friday after school together, if not more frequently than that, and those were always the best days of the week. I don't remember any particularly bad days together. At least, not until it was the beginning of the end, so to speak.

Anyway, as I mentioned before, watching those videos is one of the few things in this world that reminds me of how great a friendship we all had, prior to that awful falling out nearly three years ago now. There are a few other things on that list, though ... like watching Rent. I tried to watch it on the TV the other night. Didn't work so well. I teared up during the opening credits, just remembering how often we watched that movie, how well we could sing the songs, and how I was even learning that one song on the piano.

Even watching Purple Rain gets me a little ... nostalgic sometimes. The first time I saw that movie, and experienced the beauty that is Prince, was at an 80s party we had. Luckily I love Prince enough to push past the sad nostalgia and enjoy the movie anyway ... but still, it's hard sometimes!

Then, can't forget about facebook pictures. I don't often come across facebook photos of them, but when I do, my heart lurches up into my throat and I do get a little emotional. Especially when I see photos from the days when we were still good friends. A friend of mine posted some old photos a little while ago ... man, that got me emotional. I could remember the days most of those photos were taken, and how awesome those days were.


Ugh ... Blair's wedding is going to be so difficult. I'm trying not to think about running into those old friends there, but I can't help it sometimes. I'm hoping things will be good, and we might even talk and catch up ... but at the same time, I'm pretty sure that won't happen. I think we'll all just try and make the day as good for Blair as we possibly can, without making it too awkward for those that are still mutual friends between us.

We shall see.