Decisions, Decisions

I'm really wondering right now what would be better: a quick wedding, city hall-style... or a bigger wedding.

Let's talk about quick weddings.

A quick wedding, like at city hall, would probably be a good thing for us right now. It would obviously be way cheaper. Also, we could just get it out of the way and then worry about other things... like a second baby. I don't know yet if I want a second baby or a wedding first (though I'm thinking the latter), and Richard does want the second baby first. At the same time, he doesn't want a long engagement -- so again, the quick wedding would be good.

Of course it has its downsides too. When I think about it, as much as I'd love to have Richard's last name ASAP, I get pretty down when I think about all the things I wouldn't have at a city hall wedding: the dress, the bridesmaids, the guests, the dancing, etc. Our families wouldn't be able to attend (aside from witnesses, I suppose) and we wouldn't have all of that.

As for planned weddings...

Of course there is one major downside here: MONEY. It'll take forever to save up enough to have a decent wedding (though I don't want an expensive one, we don't have the extra moolah to save), and we have so many things holding us back from setting a date -- there's my lack of employment, the obvious lack of funds, and the fact that we don't know 100% whether or not we want that second child first. ALSO, we're thinking of buying a house, providing we can qualify for enough... so that would obviously hold us back from saving as well (although monthly mortgage payments would be cheaper than rent... but that's another topic altogether). And then there are all the stresses that come with planning. Yes, I have Hannah's fantastic assistance, but still... there's a lot to worry about on my part. Guest lists, budgeting, stopping Richard's mom from inviting all of her friends (that last one would probably stress me out the most), etc, etc, etc. So much to think about.

Of course, if we were to do the city hall thing, we would do a bigger wedding later on, when/if it's easier to save... after that second baby... perhaps after buying a house. I think maybe if we didn't already have a child in the picture, and were already pretty much married, it might be different... but obviously that is not the case for us.

I wonder if all brides to-be go through the same dilemma....

Ugh... so much to think about...